Monday, July 21, 2014

i choose to laugh. . .

“Laughter and tears are both responses to frustration and exhaustion. I myself prefer to laugh, since there is less cleaning do to do afterward.”  ~ Kurt Vonnegut 

I wake in the morning to overcast skies. The pain comes as soon as I move and I am reminded again of all I won't be able to do today. It has only been in the last few weeks that I have felt that this horrible hip, as my doctor calls it has caused me stop and think about moving about. Up until then, at least in my mind, I was able to do most the things I wanted, I just needed to be careful. 

Chronic pain messes with your entire being. It messes with your sleep and is with you every waking hour. And I feel like a baby writing about it here; mostly because I will, in six weeks or so, hopefully get some relief. I am one of the lucky ones. 

Lately it seems, I have lost my muse so to speak. I have been struggling so with my writing and my photography. Finding both a chore and not feeling that deep internal drive I have felt for so long. It made me wonder if I had lost my need; made me wonder if it was phase that was now done and over. It made me frustrated and sad. 

All kinds of things went through my head. I thought about abandoning my 365; thinking I made it to mid-year. I thought about leaving or just turning this blog off. I thought about how I could scale back; but maybe still keep something going. And then it dawned on me. . . 

It is the pain, the constant pain. It drains me and makes everything hard. It is hard to even go to the store and forget about walking the dog and if I can avoid our stairs, I do. By early evening I am dead tired and yet I wake several times a night and have to get up because it hurts. It is a cycle and it is messing with my head. 

Several years ago three little boys worked and worked on making a cable ride from one tree to another in our yard. The least of my worries was that they would get it to work. . .  But they did. They worked on it for days, then left it for a bit and came back to it a few weeks later and they got it to work. What remains of it still hangs in our yard today and when the three of them talk about it, there is still pride in their voices. 

So I have decided to take my cue from them. I will keep at it, maybe taking a bit more time off over the next six weeks or so. . . but I won't give up. And if there are days when nothing comes I will just laugh and back off for a bit and give myself some time. 
Thanks for understanding. . .

what inspires you lately? 

Sunday, July 20, 2014

week ending

“Oh", she thought, "how horrible it is that people have to grow up-and marry-and change!” 
― L.M. MontgomeryAnne of the Island

These massive beauties are climbing up our shed wall. I transplanted them a few years back and it took them awhile to really put on a show, but this year they are stunning. 

It seems like the past few months have been all about transplanting for us around here. All of us getting a fresh new start. There are still things on the east side, which need to be brought back here, but it is getting done. Real home is starting to feel like home again for all of us. 

And of course the kids; finding a home with us for a few weeks, and filling the house with blanket forts and salamanders. And now their belongings are almost gone from this space, transplanted to their new home. 

We showered these two over the weekend, the wedding is in September.  We have been friends with the grooms family forever, and growing up, he and his two brothers, who line up perfectly with my boys, were inseparable. New beginnings, young love! 

Yes, isn't she beautiful?? She is the oldest daughter of one of Justin's oldest friends JW and his beautiful wife Amy. I get lost in those eyes. She is five, just about the age Justin and her dad were when they became friends on the soccer field. The cycle continues with tons of goodness.

Every season of life brings beauty and struggles. We might neglect ourselves for a bit and find that we need to move ourselves to a better spot, with more sun, or maybe more shade. We might need to fill our space with fresh dirt and lots of water for a bit, maybe even a bit of fertilizer. . .  

And then we bloom and suddenly everything is beautiful. 

finding so much goodness is life right now, 
how about you? 

Friday, July 18, 2014

a new home. . .

“The ache for home lives in all of us. The safe place where we can go as we are and not be questioned.” 
 Maya AngelouAll God's Children Need Traveling Shoes

The kids start moving out today. They have been with us almost a month and I know they are anxious to start their lives together as a family. They have a view of Mt Rainier from their front yard, room for their toys and all their "stuff", an office, a garage, two baths, a fenced back yard and lots of love. They have a home and I am excited for them. 

It has been fun having an eight year old boy in the house again and our home has had more activity than it has seen in several years. There are days I fall into bed spent for sure, but always smiling. And I can't tell you the amount of times he has made me laugh. This time together has helped us all get to know each other and Gary and I are quiet smitten with him and his mom, and I think the feeling is mutual. 

It has made me think a lot about families and how they change and grow and how each new person brought into the fold adds something to the mix. It is my hope they receive something back too. 

As I sit and type this, upstairs our home is waking up. I hear the words "Mommy", and good morning kisses. I hear the coffee pot being started and I know the day has started and it will be full of work and goodness. 

And I feel extremely blessed. 

I am over at Focusing On Life today talking about phoneography, I would love it if you popped over. 

have a great start to you weekend, 

Monday, July 14, 2014

whizzpoppers and so much goodness

“A whizzpopper!" cried the BFG, beaming at her. "Us giants is making whizzpoppers all the time! Whizzpopping is a sign of happiness. It is music in our ears! You surely is not telling me that a little whizzpopping if forbidden among human beans?” ~ Roald  Dahl, The BFG 

summertime with a boy in the house is. . . 
lots of laughter and curiosity
discovering new things every day
and questions and more questions (and i get sucked in every time)
it is googling butlers, which we both decided we needed after reading the BFG
grape Popsicles and purple mustaches
and trips to the library followed by a perfectly penned report on wild cats (just because he wanted to) 
it is science experiments on the deck
fixing flat bike tires
and learning to weed-eat and empty compost tubs
it is cereal every morning
and sometimes frozen yogurt in the late afternoon (knowing it might spoil his dinner)
it is having a constant willing helper
who sometimes runs through the house and makes noise
and i swear it is making me feel younger and more alive
but the best thing is watching my boy
watching him take on this important role eagerly and with so much love 
and witnessing the three of them becoming a family

summertime with a boy in the house. . . 
well, it is just amazing

hope the start of your week is good, 


Sunday, July 13, 2014

week ending. . .

“Life is so full of unpredictable beauty and strange surprises. Sometimes that beauty is too much for me to handle. Do you know that feeling? When something is just too beautiful? When someone says something or writes something or plays something that moves you to the point of tears, maybe even changes you.” 
― Mark Oliver EverettThings The Grandchildren Should Know

fish were caught on the east side, some with rods, this one with a bucket. . . 

there was a reunion with the east side turtle . . . 

lots of iced lattes made with these . . . 

movie treats. . . 

a picnic at the river . . . 

and pool time to cool off . . . 

this sunset welcomed us back to the west side . . . 

where there were science experiments on the deck. . .  

these two were caught watching Scooby Doo on the iPad . . . rut r-oh

and the week ended with the best dinner with close friends. . . a surprise party for me to celebrate 60 times around the sun (next month) and a new hip (in two months). i feel so blessed and loved. and understand every day that i am one lucky girl! 

i hope your week ended well, 
are you watching the game???